To find the right solution to the right problem. — Whether you ever went to psychotherapy or just pondered your own problems for a long time, you might have experienced the following: At first, there is just an uncomfortable emotion, maybe irritation, anger or sadness. Then you think you found what the cause, i.e. the problem, of this emotion is…

16 Signs of Psychological Wellness — What is mental health? What does psychological wellness feel like? Happiness? Mastering all negative emotions? It’s tricky, isn’t it. Only very recently has there even been an interest in understanding mental wellness — mostly pioneered by the positive psychology movement. Before, the focus was always more on mental illness and…

How We Manage Anxiety (and Get Stuck) — A Case For Defense Mechanisms Defense Mechanisms are our inbuilt anxiety management system. Denial, projection, repression, intellectualization, shield us from anxiety and protect our self-esteem. Imagine your most embarrassing memories were playing in our head 24/7. Imagine you were constantly aware of the fact that everyone you love is going to die (and not in…

Melanie Klein, Otto Kernberg, Donald Winnicott, and more. — How do our early experiences shape our perception, behaviour, and emotions? What is the link between our early relationships and relationships later in life? How does the way our parents treated us impact how we treat ourselves and others later on? Why “Object Relations” Theory? These were the questions object relations theorists tried to…

The Unknown Psychology Giant of the Last Century — Alfred Adler (1870–1937) was next to Sigmund Freud and Carl Gustav Jung one of the three great psychodynamic thinkers of the last century. He was Sigmund Freud’s prodigy and supposed to be the heir of his psychoanalytic tradition that would then continue and thrive long after Freud’s death. Breaking with Sigmund Freud But just…

Because Avoiding Won’t Get You a Meaningful Life. — What is important to you? And I mean really important. What dreams, values, and goals are you striving for? And why have you not reached them, yet? My guess is that, while moving toward your goals and dreams, you’ve encountered your personal beasts. The guardians of the gate to perceived…

The Separation of Tasks — by Alfred Adler. — We like to think of ourselves as totally independent. We like to believe we are free-willed — “I did it my way” — “I can do it on my own” kind of people. While taking radical responsibility for our own lives is incredibly important, we sometimes forget just how interconnected…

If you haven’t heard of Alfred Adler, it’s time. — Loneliness has become a risk factor for early death and tremendously decreases the quality of life of way too many people. Meanwhile what most of us long for is a sense of belonging, being part of a community, to find our tribe. Alfred Adler was one of the three great…

That will likely change how you look at relationships forever. — Esther Perel has been a couple’s therapist for over 35 years. She has seen and heard it all. She has written about desire and infidelity, given TedTalks and recorded multiple podcasts. You might find that some of her words ring so true, it will be beautiful and painful at the…