In an era where everything seems possible, we feel the pressure of “living up to our potential”. If we are unhappy, isn’t it our own fault? We are overwhelmed, trying to “find our passion”, dealing with FOMO. As the world is shouting possibilities, it becomes harder to hear our own…

Understanding Yourself With Adlerian Psychology — We can easily believe that life is something that just happens to us. That we are pawns played by fate or destiny and that there is really not much we can do. While there are certainly givens in life, a certain hand we are dealt, and a family of origin…

Take the Personality Style Test — Introduction In my work as a psychologist clients sometimes gasp and ask me “How did you know that? Can you read my mind?” What I actually did in 90% of cases was relying on my superpower as a psychologist: recognising patterns. In my training to become a psychodynamic psychotherapist, I’m being…

16 Signs of Psychological Wellness — What is mental health? What does psychological wellness feel like? Happiness? Mastering all negative emotions? It’s tricky, isn’t it. Only very recently has there even been an interest in understanding mental wellness — mostly pioneered by the positive psychology movement. Before, the focus was always more on mental illness and…

How We Manage Anxiety (and Get Stuck) — A Case For Defense Mechanisms Defense Mechanisms are our inbuilt anxiety management system. Denial, projection, repression, intellectualization, shield us from anxiety and protect our self-esteem. Imagine your most embarrassing memories were playing in our head 24/7. Imagine you were constantly aware of the fact that everyone you love is going to die (and not in…

Melanie Klein, Otto Kernberg, Donald Winnicott, and more. — How do our early experiences shape our perception, behaviour, and emotions? What is the link between our early relationships and relationships later in life? How does the way our parents treated us impact how we treat ourselves and others later on? Why “Object Relations” Theory? These were the questions object relations theorists tried to…

So, Self-Improvement Didn’t Make You Happy? — Many people — maybe also you — start the new year, the new month, or the new day with the intention to become better, more productive, efficient, calm, focused, happy. …

The Unknown Psychology Giant of the Last Century — Alfred Adler (1870–1937) was next to Sigmund Freud and Carl Gustav Jung one of the three great psychodynamic thinkers of the last century. He was Sigmund Freud’s prodigy and supposed to be the heir of his psychoanalytic tradition that would then continue and thrive long after Freud’s death. Breaking with Sigmund Freud But just…

Because Avoiding Won’t Get You a Meaningful Life. — What is important to you? And I mean really important. What dreams, values, and goals are you striving for? And why have you not reached them, yet? My guess is that, while moving toward your goals and dreams, you’ve encountered your personal beasts. The guardians of the gate to perceived…